mess

Yes. Now that's what I'm talking about. You fucks shoulda posted when you were like that earlier in the evening. It would have been that much more fun to deal with drunken postings earlier. When I was more drunken too.

i trifrt got tell tyu
yall dontm,yhoidoudf'

Yhey'rew an wemmee.[p

What I need now is some nice, fresh blood. This stuff I got now is toast. My breath still smells like anise and when I took a whiz this morning, the toilet water louched.
Virtually eveybody I met is awesome and exceeded expectations.

I can't wait for brunch at The Cuff.

I've got pics, but I need permission or editing requestss from the folks in them: Mostly LL, Abby, DG, Trainer, Spongie, Cros, Verbal, Fluffy, and Dinky.

Um . . . I think I'll need to preview anything taken after about the 6th drink.

The Swizzle and Puta Pinche were the big hits of the evening for me. As far as I remember. Oh, and that very nice nice stuff Cros brought. It's all a little hazy after the dirty whore.

Meanwhile, it was a delightful evening, with charming people, great food, friendly hosts, and lots and lots of booze. Thanks to checkout time being noon, I did manage to make my flight . . . I got no wakeup call, but I got a "are you going to check out or stay with us another night?" call.

I also got a nasty hangover, which is finally fading! At least I didn't

I'M NEVER GONNA DRINK AGAIN! Well, not today.

In case anyone was worried, I did NOT become the Mayor's chew toy. I was CROSBY's chew toy. (There's a photo somewhere. I think I got rabies.) Dinky became Sarah's chew toy. Da Mayor and Cros both became Skeeter's punching bags. All on Friday. There was no biting or beating (to my knowledge) on Saturday!

Well, the festivities are over, and the clean-up almost finished. There were no broken bones or lawsuits (at least, not as yet) to report. I would like to thank all of you that came (and also to thank a couple of you for not showing up) and helping to create an evening that I will remember until I get senile. It was grate to be able to put a faces to names for someone other than Jack. The HUGE assortment of HGs was awe inspiring. Also, the mysterious "Hellboy" with that elusive Eaglemont fennel was truly an absinthe that I won't soon forget. I really would like to be able to find the sourcing of that Eaglemont fennel, it was the most flavorul and fragant fennel I have yet encountered. It made that mysterious Hellboy HG the drink to remember. Again thanks for a wonderful evening.
GS

Eaglemont? Hellboy?
Somebody hit me with a fish for not being able to go.
Glad you guys had a blast. Can't wait to hear all the details...

Pictures please...

I think the picture people (Sponge, ABby, and Hiram) mostly have yet to get home. I'm sure there will be many photos by tomorrow! (Maybe even the mysterious Jake Batemaster!)

Sounds like a great time!

I just landed and picked up the dog. I've gotta hit the sheets for the night but I wanted to do a quick check in.

First, a big thanks to Gassy and his friend for putting together a great spread. I only wish I'd made it a little longer. And I also with I could remember what I drank and how I got home. Thanks again to SB for taking care of me and watching my back.

I am happy to report that I came out of this whole mess basically unscathed. I was punched and smacked and man-handled (by a woman, no less) but I escaped with what little virtue I had in tact. And I was so happy to be able to put faces and voices on all these crazy bastards.

I can't muster the energy for anything more right now but I'll get back to this tomorrow.

Ok, here it goes.

I show up at the Motel 6 about 5 PM. I walk in the door, Crosby is beating on the Mayor, SB is taking pictures, and Dinky was looking a bit pained. The Mayor got a sock ripped off within seconds of my walking in the door. I say my hellos and next thing you know, with warning, the Mayor is up. It is LCLWWF time! The Mayor gets picked up in a firemans carry, and tossed into the bed. Crosby stands up, and he is a BIG man, but luckily he is drunk so I toss him around as well. Within 10 minutes, we are all on big happy dysfuctional family. By the way, the Mayor's eye was rammed into a hotel radiator, and oh you should see it now. We went to Gassy's house, had several glasses of what can only be described as mediocre (HA HA HA! It ROCKED!) HG. This was Dinky SB Cros Gassy and I, and we drank 3/4s a liter in about two hours. Then, it was off to the Buzz Inn, a fine establishment that 86ed Cros as soon as he walked into the door. The rest of us followed within hours. There, we met with Jack, Mrs. Jack, and the soon to be infamous TrainerAZ.

Anyway, more later. I wanna post some pics.

SB Louchie and Cros.

Dinky, SB

At the far left, you can see the one, the only, Jack Batemaster. Then the host of LCLF, the best pic of Drinkslinger ever, and a friend of the host. Gentlemen, if you read this, I do remember your names but am not sure about posting them.

So far in my narrative, I have only covered the first few hours of Friday. So I would like to take a minute to talk about Mrs. Jack Batemaster. This following pic is life size. Cros is about 6'2 or so, and she is about 4'9 and about 80 pounds. And, after a few beers, and a few more, she grew to hate Drinkslinger. Oh, and she molested AB Normal, but we will get to that in a minute. The hate is festering, and we are all playing peacekeeper. Next thing you know, this tiny rocket yells STUPID DUMB DINKY! and takes him down. Yes, Dinky got taken and she is now biting his leg. Wow, you really had to be there for that one, and I am sorry I did not get pics. It was all over so fast...

I have to give many props to AB Normal. Without her, and a few others, but none from the lounge, this would have been SausageFestWest. This pic is right after her molestation by Mrs. Jack. Are there pics of the molestation itself? You betcha! But, upon request, those will not be posted. Ha Ha, shoulda been there.

Mrs JBM, AB, SpongeBob.

I just burned myself with peanut butter (don't ask) so this is gonna slow down as I am typing one handed.

Crosby, DS, JBM

You will hear so much about Trainer at LCLF later, I am not even gonna start now. Here he is, sober the morning after. The (official) party has not even started yet!

This pic is from LCLF, but my earlier pics of Fluffy G don't do him justice. This is a good one though.

We've all read Balzdeep's posts. You think he is funny online? So much better in real drunken life.

Trainer, Balz™

I am getting tired, so just pics and names now.

Mr GreenGenes

Green and Cloudy

The spread. You read Gasspectro talk about all the HG? I had 13 different HG's, and one that I think was pulling my leg. On that, my lips are sealed. And no, I don't think this was all of it.

Oh, I have a lot to say about the Monkey. Oh, yes indeed, this is our very own DG Leadbetter, and his drink of choice. Just look at the label.

Edit: Picture poorly edited for clarity. That is what it says, though.

You know, I owe Hiram an apology. I did not get many pics of him at all, and that sucks as he rules. Yes, CG, I did ask him your question, and he loved it.

Left to right: G&C and Verbal Kraze, Hiram with the camera, the Mayor in all his beat to xit glory, Fluffy G, and Trainer on Cros's lap.

DG, Crosby and JBM doing his smouldering look of love.

I finally got to hear Balz™ tell the joke! But, I was only inside for twenty minutes or so, so I heard the last half of one and the beginning of another. This was during the riveting "Texan with a harelip" joke.

Verbal Kraze. I did not really get to talk to him or his wife, but they are very nice. Also, a good shot of AB's hair.

Well, I have more but I need some sleep. I think you get the gist. One parting shot before I go...

Masque

Excellent pics Skeeter. It looks like you guys had one hell of a party out there. I am sorely sorry that I missed it. You can bet the farm though that I will make it to LF04. That table of HG looked impressive. And is that a whole bottle of Urine that DG is holding?!?!?!?! Holy xit. That stuff is THE xit!!! if it's the #4. Kudos and thanks to the Urine maker for sending a sample to the PussyHead.

Well I hope everyone recovers real soon and is not too scarred from their physical and emotional wounds. Mr. Mayor you should put a frozen pork chop on your eye, that will reduce the swelling a bit. Haha. You all have to be in tip top shape for LF04 in three months. I hope to see everyone there and like Abby said finally be able to put faces (for the people that aren't there or are not in the pictures) and voices on all you crazy bastards.

Poor girl doesn't know her hubby is a gay leatherman who looks like Eddie Izzard!

A job well done, folks.

Dinkys haircut looks good.

The mayor's eye looks bad.

DG has great taste in shirts and cigars.

Cros is tall.

JBMs wifey is shorter than I am (though most women, with the exception of my GF aren't!)

Ballz™ looks exactly as I remembered him, one eye half shut, stumbling over "but ya fook one goat!"

Hiram looks like Ozzy in that pic.

Trainer looks happy.

Masque, thanks for the grate photos!

So much HG I've never heard of before, can't wait to hear the tasting comments.

jack and abby are much hotter than i imagined.


dinky is now looking like that kid in the 80's movie "Can't Buy Me Love"....but with less style.

Nice job Y'all! Looks like ya' had a good time. How 'bout some HG reviews?

She's all mine!

which one?

Ha!

no, really.

we can draw straws if you'd like.

I can't even draw a straight line!

how about a gay one?

Grate pics! Looks like y'all had an amazing time! Wish I coulda been there. I got to talk to Skeeter, Jack & (briefly) Fluffy on the phone during the festivities. The following is an excerpt from my conversation with Jack:

Jack: "I thought you would've had a Brooklyn (?) accent..."

Me: "I thought you would've had an English accent..."

I had heard that Dinky got a haircut, but I had no idea about the perm! Jeebus H. Christ!

That picture of DG with the cigar and the "urine" bottle just kills me

Thanks for the pics masque, you may also bet the farm I will make it to LF04.

Yay Skeeter!

Ok, I'm a little more human today. Although, after seeing Skeet's photos, I'm beginning to feel a little drunk again.

I would just like to take this moment to say that I had so much fun this weekend. I loved meeting all of you. Not a bad egg in the bunch. I got a lot of time in with some of you and not so much with others (epsecially those around only Saturday, since I passed out so damned early ).

Despite all the mess, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Everyone, get your asses to Allentown in July.

Awesome...

More, more, more...

You will have to excuse me here, I was informed this morning that one of our members the I thought had cleared posting his pic was OK may have recanted. If so, I apologize and will replace with edited photos soon.

Woo-Hoo. Great photos and reports.

Looks like a great time was had by all.