Full Metal Jacket is a goldmine...

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Pyle, you had best unfuck yourself and start shitting me Tiffany cufflinks or I will definitely fuck you up! "

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Pyle, you climb obstacles like old people fuck! "

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit, tinkle-toed cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy fucking godmother said it! Out-fucking-standing!"

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "What is your major malfunction, numbnuts? Didn't Mommy and Daddy show you enough attention when you were a child?"

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds, exactly three fuckin' seconds, to wipe that stupid lookin' grin off your face or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull fuck you!"

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Jesus Christ Pyle, don't try too hard. If God would have wanted you up there he would have miracled your ass up there, wouldn't he?"

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Hell I like you, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister."

Of course in Scarface:
"Say hello to my little friend!"

DG

"Absinthe, is the aphrodisiac of the self.
The Green Fairy who lives in the Absinthe, wants your soul.
But you are safe with me."

FFC's Dracula

I just saw 'Love Actually' last night. Yes I know, not my type of movie, my wife made me go. I am a David Lynch fan, but it had a hilarious line in it.

One guy said something along the lines of:

"Kids, don't buy drugs. Become a Pop Star instead and people will just give them to you."

Ohhh. From Fight Club.

Marla:
"I haven't been fucked like that since grade school"

The deleted version was pretty good, too...

"I want to have your abortion..."

"No matter where you go .... there you are."
-- Buckaroo Banzai


DG

Tombstone, my old roomate was addicted to that movie... he watched it at least once a day. I've watched it four hundred times if I've watched it once. He can recite every line from the flick, I only remember a few.

Doc Holliday- "I have not yet begun to defile myself."

Wyatt Earp - "You gonna do somethin'? Or are you just gonna stand there and bleed?"

Wyatt Earp - "You die first, get it? Your friends might get me in a rush, but not before I make your head into a canoe, you understand me?"

Doc Holliday - "It seems poker's just not your game, Ike. I know, let's have a spelling contest!" ---No offence Gimpy!

My favorite quote from the B&W version of "Night of the Living Dead."

"Yeah, they're dead ... they're all messed up."


DG

Raindog,

You forgot: Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Private Pyle, I'm going to cut your balls off so you can't contaminate the rest of the world"

And my favs:

"Say you're thinking about a plate of shrimp. Suddenly someone says plate, or shrimp, or plate of shrimp. Out of the blue. No explanation. No use looking for one either. It's all part of the cosmic unconsciousness." - Miller (Repo Man)

or

Bud: Goddamn-dipshit-Rodriguez-gypsy-dildo-punks! I'll get your ass!

The End.

Surely you remember a few lines from "The Hills Have Eyes"

"Fuck you" comes to mind.

I do like Repo Man muchly.

"A repo man lives by a code..."

Good one.
Gosh, if only I were a bit uglier!

My signature.

I met that actor at a horror convention once ... real stand up kinda guy, much like our esteemed Mayor.

Raindog, you floored me on that one .... thank goodness I wasn't drinking anything yet.

DG

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb:

President Merkin Muffley: Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
----------
Colonel "Bat" Guano: I think you're some kind of deviated prevert. I think General Ripper found out about your preversion, and that you were organizing some kind of mutiny of preverts. Now MOVE!!
----------
General "Buck" Turgidson: Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.


Buck

Best of Show:

Harlan Pepper: I used to be able to name every nut that there was. And it used to drive my mother crazy, because she used to say, "Harlan Pepper, if you don't stop naming nuts," and the joke was that we lived in Pine Nut, and I think that's what put it in my mind at that point. So she would hear me in the other room, and she'd just start yelling. I'd say, "Peanut. Hazelnut. Cashew nut. Macadamia nut." That was the one that would send her into going crazy. She'd say, "Would you stop naming nuts!" And Hubert used to be able to make the sound, he couldn't talk, but he'd go "rrrawr rrawr" and that sounded like Macadamia nut. Pine nut, which is a nut, but it's also the name of a town. Pistachio nut. Red pistachio nut. Natural, all natural white pistachio nut.

"Secretary".

It's not the word, but the way Maggie Gyllenhaal says it.

Viddy well, little brother. Viddy well.

And the first thing that flashed into my gulliver was that I'd like to have her right down there on the floor with the old in-out, real savage.

animal mother: you think we waste gooks for "freedom"? this is a slaughter. if i'm gonna get my balls blown off for a word, my word is "poontang".

joker: iwanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture, and kill them. i wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill.

jack nicholson in as good as it gets: "sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here."

willy wonka: "where is fancy bread? is it in the heart or in the head?"

willy wonka: "candy is dandy but liqour is quicker"

A long one from A Clockwork Orange:

"One thing I could never stand is to see a filthy, dirty old drunkie, howling away at the filthy songs of his fathers and going blerp, blerp in between as it might be a filthy old orchestra in his stinking rotten guts. "

Same movie:

"Excuse me, missus. No time for the old in-out, I've just come to read the meter."

Bladerunner:

"All those moments will be lost in time like tears in rain. Time to die."

"I can eat fifty eggs."

One of my favorite movies!

"You run one time, you got yourself a set of chains. You run twice you got yourself two sets. You ain't gonna need no third set, 'cause you gonna get your mind right."

"Hey Lord, whatever I done, don't strike me blind for another couple of minutes."

"Well that oughta be easy for a genuine son of a bitch."

"Sometimes nuthin' is a real cool hand."

Wow...Gotta love this thread.

Bladerunner!
Cool Hand Luke!
etc...

OK, how about these:

"you just gonna stand there and whistle dixie?"
Outlaw Josey Whales

"Are you gonna fight or just stand there and bleed?"
Tombstone

Clint is the man!

I hate illinois nazis.

Well, I haven't really been missing it, Bob.

Suck my fat one, you cheap dimestore hood.

I'm sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.

Was it over when the Russians bombed Pearl HArbor?

SHITTER WAS FULL

But, I'm funny how? Funny like a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh? I'm here to fuckin' amuse you?

It'd be a lot cooler if you did...

In a word: pleasure. It's like, my pleasure in other people's leisure.

Well I don't wanna break up the meeting or nothin', but she's somethin' of a cunt, ain't she Doc?

Alright, you primitive screwheads, listen up: THIS... is my BOOM STICK!

We come for your daughter, Chuck.

I never did it either. I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar.

Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

Sometimes you just have to say What the Fuck!

Hello. My name is Intigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Last night at the dance my brother paid a dollar to see your underpants.



eh that's enough for now.

"Heineken? FUCK THAT SHIT! PABST BLUE RIBBON!!!!!" - Frank Booth

"I'll send you a love letter! Straight from my heart, fucker! You know what a love letter is? It's a bullet from a fucking gun! You recieve a love letter from me, you're fucked forever! You understand, fuck? I'll send you straight to hell, fucker!" - Frank Booth

Arthur - "Are all men from the future loud-mouthed braggarts?" Ash - "Nope. Just me baby... Just me."
Army of Darkness

"We want the finest wines available to humanity. We want them here, and we want them now."

"Don't threaten ME with a dead fish!"

"We've gone on holiday by mistake."


(Withnail and I)

Jonathan Winters in : Now You See It, Now You Don't. (On collecting)

"A real Collector would sell his own mother for a Rembrandt",
"Remember, collecting is a mania, and mania defined in the dictonary,"
"Is a form of insanity."

From the Sopranos(I know, not a movie!):
"Have you ever known anyone who's commited suicide?"

" Oh sure I did! I used to live in Seattle!"

Shoot a Nuke down a bug-hole, gotta lotta dead bugs!

Ya gotta keep on keepin' on, I mean, Life's a garden ... Dig it!

(In a high squeaky voice) Do ya guys want some cookies?

Kermit: She just walked out on me!
Ralph: Yeah, typical! That's why I live alone. I finish work, I go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk, and go to bed.



That's it for me right now. Write that down!

All by W.C. Fields:

"Anything worth having, is worth cheating for."

"I bend every effort to win, and I come from a long line of effort benders."

"It's a crazy old world, and a man is lucky if he gets out of it alive."

"If you set a bucket of beer in front of a pig, he'd turn up it's nose, or would you rather be a duck."

"I'd rather have two girls at 21 each, than one girl who is 42."

On being told he was drunk: "And you're crazy, but when I wake up, I'll be sober, you'll still be crazy the rest of your life."

"Was I in here last night, and did I spend a $20 dollar bill? (Bartender: "Yes") "What a load that is off my mind, I thought I'd lost it."

"You can't cheat an honest man, Never give a sucker an even break, and Never smarten up a chump".

When a harried film producer enters The Black Pussy Cafe and asks for something to settle his nerves : "Joe if the gentleman has butterflies in his stomach", "I suggest a a dash of Rover in it", ..."Dog",..."Absinthe", "it's very good for the nerves."

Great film!

I don't know why, but, I love that line.

That's what is so great about Lynch, even if you can't really tell what it is that's so great about his movies, you just know that they are!

When I saw BV for the first time (waaay back) it was actually the same line that got stuck in my mind!

What I like about Lynch movies (and some other directors) is that he realizes that plot does not make a movie. The plot is there to hold the viewer's hand. God forbid, one doesn't understand what's going on. Maybe sometimes you don't get, but you feel it. Fuck the plot.

I really enjoy movies by directors like Lynch that insist on doing it their way. It's their way or no movie, Gilliam is another like that. Take "Brazil" for example:

Sam Lowry: I only know you got the wrong man.
Jack Lint: Information Transit got the wrong man. I got the *right* man. The wrong one was delivered to me as the right man, I accepted him on good faith as the right man. Was I wrong?
----------
Sam Lowry: How are the twins?
Jack Lint: Triplets.
Sam Lowry: My, how time flies!
----------
Guard: Don't fight it son. Confess quickly! If you hold out too long you could jeopardize your credit rating.

I thought "Jabberwocky" was brilliant.

DG

Some good ones from 'The Rules of Attraction' - 2002

Victor - "...drank absinthe in a bar named absinthe..."

Sean - "If she doesn't come then forget it. Fucking a girl who won't come is like asking a question in a letter."

Paul - "I no longer know who I am. I feel like the ghost of a total stranger."

In case some of this stuff is getting a little cerebral; Let's take it down a notch or two.

Porn Star: The Legend of Ron Jeremy:
Himself: I'd like to see Richard Burton or Sir John Gielgud or Sir Laurence Olivier do "Macbeth", memorizing all that dialogue, and have a boner.

ABBA: The Movie:
Reporter: Is it true you are the proud recipient of an award as the lady with the most sexiest bottom?
Agnetha: How can I answer to that? I don't know...I haven't seen it!

Attack of the 50 Foot Woman:
Nancy Archer: I know where my husband is! He's with that woman!

VeggieTales: Where's God When I'm S-Scared?:
Larry: Compared to God, the Slime Monster is like a teeny little cornflake!
Junior Asparagus: Yeah, but the Slime Monster can squirt slime out of his ears!

Fast Times at Ridgemont High:
Stacy Hamilton: When a guy has an orgasm, how much comes out?
Linda Barrett: A quart or so.

Flesh Eating Mothers:
Jeff Nathan: What are we supposed to do, stay here and have our asses chewed by our mothers?

Slumber Party Massacre:
Jackie: What do all the guys see in Diane anyway?
Trish Devereaux: She's beautiful.
Jackie: I think she's got a big mouth.
Kimberly Clarke: Hey, it's not the size of your mouth; it's what's in it that counts.

Beavis and Butt-head Do America:
Beavis: I am the great Cornholio. I need T.P. for my bunghole.


Buck

Gilliam, Lynch & Kubrick are my favorite directors...

Also from Dr. Strangelove:

Mandrake: Jack, how did you develop this theory?

Gen. Ripper: Well Mandrake, it came to me during the phsysical act of love. A feeling of emptyness followed. Fortunately I was able to interpret these feelings correctly - loss of essence. Women sense my power, and they come to me seeking the life essence. I do not avoid women Mandrake, but I do deny them my essense.

Boom-boom Kitty-fuck!

A favortie "Kubrickism" of mine is the way the bad guys are often soft spoken and overly polite.

Examples

HAL 9000: "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."

The way Alex of Clockwork Orange addressed the audiance in the narration.

In Barry Lyndon a highway robber says something like "Sir if you would kindly hand over all of your money and jewelry I shall put my gun away and we shall both go about our merry ways."

In Full Metal Jacket the drill seargent lets loose a string of racial slurs and says all will be treated equally (OK, he was NOT soft-spoken).

In Eyes Wide Shut a man behind hands Tom Cruise a letter politely threatening him not to come back.

Mr. Grene Genes

“I’ve had more defeats than you have teeth, I know one when I see it.”…
…“If you are broken it is only because you are brittle.”

Katherine Hepburn, as Eleanor of Aquitaine in The Lion in Winter

Interesting 2001 Trivia:
Why was HAL 9000 named HAL?
Every letter in HAL is 1 letter away from IBM.

Why does HAL sing Daisy when Dave is shutting him down?
Daisy was the first piece of music ever played by a computer. It implies HAL was reverting to his childhood memories as he got shut down.

Truly a work of genious.
My favourite line from that film is
"Even a stopped clock gives the right time twice a day."

Some more gems---
From Yellow Submarine:
Ringo: Look, it's a cyclops!
Paul: That's not a cyclops! It's got two eyes.
Ringo: Oh no! It's a bicyclops!

From Something About Mary:
"Was it the frank or the beans?"

From GoldenEye (Bond says to the girl Christmas, played by Denise Richards):
" I thought Christmas only came once a year."