Sponge Bob
Aug 10 2004, 07:29 AM
QUOTE
I'm definitely a classic romantic. I like a candlelight dinner, some quiet background music, and a couple hits of ether. I prefer a woman that has insurance and a car would be great as I need to make the occassional trip to Mexico to pick up "souvenirs".
Country: New Mexico, U.S.A.
Yeah, I know all the ladies are either taken or non-practicing, but they've got a guy for half off. He's not going to be around long, because women just can't resist a sale.
You just can't beat mail order
Glassolalia
Aug 10 2004, 07:32 AM
All I can think of is the ether scene in Fear and Loathing.....
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 08:24 AM
For a moment, I thought it might be the mutt.
~Y~
Aug 10 2004, 10:58 AM
Try the compatibility test!!!
My perfect match is Hans of Hannover Germany...
"German sailor seeks mermaid".. During my long hours out at sea I often wonder if my soulmate is near or far. I have been successful at werk but not in love. Yes, I've had too much schnitzel but I have a sexy attitude and I'm not shy about my body.
I just know if I can snatch up all 400lbs. of him before someone else does we'll never leave the bedroom!!!
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 11:02 AM
I got Hans, too.
Since I'm non-practicing, you may have him.
But it pains me to give up someone so sexy...
DrinkSlinger
Aug 10 2004, 11:03 AM
Looks like we get to share Hans.
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 11:05 AM
Hmmmm...methinks it's rigged.
Maybe Hans has reached the dollar bin and they're just trying to unload him.
From looking at him, I can't see why.
Perhaps he's emotionally unstable.
Or a serial killer.
DrinkSlinger
Aug 10 2004, 11:05 AM
That's a hot fucking cock.
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 11:08 AM
I actually snorted.
~Y~
Aug 10 2004, 11:10 AM
We could move to Utah and share him! Do you think he'll fit into Utah? If he does, will there still be room left for us? Why does love have to be so complicated?
Off. Jack Batemaster
Aug 10 2004, 11:43 AM
I was hoping for Daryl ('cuz he looks just like Skeeter without glasses,) but I got Han(d)s too.
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 11:54 AM
Anyone else think that Clyde kinda looks like Kirk, only more... special?
Absinthe_1900
Aug 10 2004, 12:38 PM
The guy who drinks paint thinner would be a good Lounge addition
.
Sponge Bob
Aug 10 2004, 12:50 PM
From the article in "Mail Order Brides Monthly"
QUOTE
Q: What does it cost the parties involved?
Art: It all depends on the demand. We have an excellent variety of quality bachelors, and the highest demand is for men around 30 years old with lots of hair. For example if you want to order a 52 year old bald man who has bad psioriasis, well then maybe $600.. but say we had a candidate that looked like a young Erik Estrada, well that kind of product doesn't last long, we typically charge around $9,000.
Q: $9,000 seems like a lot of money for arranging a marriage, are many women willing to pay that?
Art: Some women have a lot of money and they are willing to spend it. And that's if we had a young Erik Estrada. Most of our candidates are more like Ernest Borgnine or perhaps Abe Vigoda, there aren't many young Erik Estradas out there.
TrainerAZ
Aug 10 2004, 09:29 PM
OH NO! I GOT HANS!
Then I went back, reversed every answer, and got HANS again!
How much ya wanna bet HANS owns the website?
perruche_verte
Aug 10 2004, 09:36 PM
Yeah, I think it's rigged. I kept getting him too.
Don't worry, there's enough of him for all of us.
A.B. Normal
Aug 10 2004, 09:45 PM
And then some.
jaded prol
Aug 11 2004, 02:41 AM
Hey, Abe Vigoda was cool!
Absinthe_1900
Aug 11 2004, 07:43 AM
...
Absinthe_1900
Aug 11 2004, 07:51 AM
Another recruiter was seen lurking.
Absinthe_1900
Aug 11 2004, 07:57 AM
And this one really looks like trouble.
A.B. Normal
Aug 13 2004, 09:23 PM
I believe he's been purchased already.
By twins!
TrainerAZ
Aug 13 2004, 10:58 PM
BOOBIES!!!
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