<acknowledging but ignoring the obvious jokes on spitting and swallowing>

I worked in a bar in a strip mall in Scottsdale, two doors down from a fantastic wine shop.
Every Friday evening, they held tastings in our bar from 5-7.
I didn't have to be there until 8 but I always arrived early.
I'd sit in the back office reading a book and the owner of the wine shop would come back there every fifteen minutes with a new glass for me.

I wasn't so much "tasting" as I was "getting tanked on good wine."

A month later we are still waiting...................

Please Ned, please, please.............

New Jade- the only REAL Burnt™ absinthe!

Didn't I hear something about November, a couple of months back?

So who's gonna buy me a bottle for my birthday in November?

November of what year, Abs?

Good thing my birthday is in November every year!

I think that was the release of the definitive, labelled version of VS.

Ditto.

Good. Because my old Jade- the only REAL Burnt™ absinthe has gone "off."

Where's it gone off to?

Really?

So much for being able to age it for a century!

It should go off to my house.

Start makin' grilles.

Funkytown.

Like I said, my house.

He said "funky" not "fuckme" town.

GOTTA MOVE ON !

It's been real, Trashcan Man.

Will you say "My life for you." once, before you go.

I thought that was in Seattle.

No. Seattle is "fuckyou" town.

Hail xenophobia!

Um, no. He's just telling the truth.

I meant Seattle's xenophobia, not Hiram's.

He seems quite the opposite.

I guess I can understand a little Xenaphobia . . .

She's got a big mouth...

Looks good for... oh well.

Looks full of gnashing teeth to me.

Also, I prefer my sword-carrying shemales without make-up and Hollywood hairdo.

Looks full of gnashing teeth to me.

Also, I prefer my sword-carrying shemales without make-up and silly hairdo and with more interesting lines.

NAHHHHH!

Gimme that warrior amazon babe on Farscape!

Ok, too geeky in here.

Don't go. Not a geek thread, so on second thoughts, you don't need the sword. Bonus points for you vs. Éowyn: you're not a blonde anymore.

Just make sure to bring your interesting lines.

I know, it's casting pearls to the swine, but...

Like these?

Not anymore.
Below, the quintessential Abby photo from the blonde days...
Sorry to disappoint you, Sixer.

In all the photos I’ve seen of you, there’s always a glass in front of your face.

I like to be prepared.

I didn't know you were an 80s hair band singer!

I thought they were all men who dressed like women. Damn, some really WERE women!

Only a few,
but yes.

Nothing a little editing can't fix. Voilà, gone is the disappointment.

What is the deal with your nail polish?? Did you have to borrow Grandma's?

Ha!

Actually, I normally wear either clear or almost clear.
But I had scortched two of my fingernails in a drunken zippo accident.

OH MY GAWD!

I see the pic, but I just can't imagine you being a blonde.

I never wanted to be blonde.
I just got bored one day.
Didn't last very long.

Abby, you're totally hot as a blonde.

Trainer, the pic of Xena makes me wet.

Abby is totally hot as any thing.

'Cept when she wears that old lady nail polish.

I had to cover up the charred tips, damnit.
I would've just cut my nails but then you'd be asking me why I look like I have dwarf fingers.

Fuck it, I'm going in and editing the photo now.

(edit: nevermind...the photo program on this computer refuses to start. damnit!)

Deep red nail polish is real *in* right now.

That's what I thought.