Reference your new(?) avatar, this neighborhood regular won't let me out of the house unless I have peanuts. Makes going to work interesting.
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I left my window open one summer evening in my old East Village apartment, and woke up with a similarly aggressive squirrel sitting on my lap. I didn't feed him though, so he didn't come back.

A couple months ago a squirrel came down our chimney, pushed open the damper,knocked over the screen and started running around the house.
Of course our cats thought it was some kind of new toy and started chasing it.
Took us about 10 minutes to herd it to the front door and make it run out.

Supper!

Too small, it barely would have been enough for the cats.

That's why you shoot several
they are best as a breakfast meat.

Tree Rat's.

The squirrel after hanging out at the lounge.

what are they in possession of?

More intellect than me I’m sure.

i doubt that.

raccoons, yes, but not squirrels.

Raccoons are crafty bastards.

plus they are always wearing masks.

and that's just cool

As seen in Liver's 'hood:

Chip monks on crack...

Where are The Tubes when we need them?

Too bad I need to head up into the mountains to see those crackmunks. Down here on the plains we only have these doobiedogs.

Raccoons eat squirrels.

The night after finding the undead yet maggot-seeded specimen in the back yard, I could barely make out a muffled squeal under the ungodly snarling emanating from beyond my open bedroom window. Nope, the squirrel wasn’t dead until that moment…

I woke up to find a half eaten carcass on my patio. All that remained of the lower half was a congealed red blob under an open ribcage.

By the time I returned home from work, the remains had mysteriously vanished.

Every winter I get 1 or 2 squirrels in the attic & always over my bedroom. A couple of times in the middle of the night I wake up to nuts rolling across my ceiling (ceiling has angles) and dropping down the wall. I can imagine the squirrel thinking "Goddammit "

Yeah it will be grate when the seeds sprout and you get trees growing in your walls.

squirrels aint nuthin ta fuck with

...

"DO NOT look the beast directly in the eye!"

Pretty cool, Abby. I'll occasionally feed this one by hand, but always with the admonition,

"Don't trust everyone like this, especially the guy across the street. He'll probably shoot you".


He never really says anything back, but gives me that knowing nod, like,

"yeah. stinkin' rednecks"

Abby it’s good to see you here. I have to admit to having squirrel friends every since I was a little kid. I have had pet wild squirrels everywhere we have lived. This tread has brought back a lot of fond memories of standing at the edge of the woods and having squirrels come down from the trees and eat from my hand. Happy Holidays Abby.

I've got this thing for Squirrels too.

It's that Scandinavian Ratatosk thing I guess...

Oscar, that brings back some dim if not fond memories
where, as a very young child I discovered that if you hold 2 poker chips together and twist them
the chirping sound will bring squirrels out of a tree
just as sure as cigar smoke will drive them back.

Carl, the Carlsbad squirrel, was my first squirrel encounter. They were all too wild back in Virginia. Instead, I played with groundhogs when I was a kid. I named them all Harvey. Then my dad filled in all the holes so our horses wouldn't break their legs.

RIP, Harveys.

I also played with crickets, but that went horribly wrong. Turns out they can't survive all that long in lego houses.

Every time I see the title of this thread I get the urge to post pictures of clowns.

That's what I was afraid of when I first saw it.
But then I saw who started it. Hans is a gentleman...unlike some of you drunken troglodytes.

weren't they the band that sang 'Wild Thing'?

There you go again with the multisyllabic words


Sweet dreams…

grate, a gay british clown.

Those teeth do look English don't they?

mostly.

there's way too many, though.

Chrysppvs is going to dress up like that right before he climbs the bell tower.

"They were all too wild back in Virginia. "

they also get pretty damn big... i mean like the size of a cat big, try to pet one of those and you'll pull back a bloody stump.

My wee Scottish lad told me about vicious squirrels in Glasgow attacking homeless people but I didn't believe him. Perhaps I was wrong.

'Ave ye'ver 'erd the sound of a squirrel eat'en a nos'?

Let em' eat cake.

Aye, boot ya fook one squirrel....

I'm sorry, but I'm not ready to admit that my penis that small yet.

Perhaps not, but that squirrel is easily bribed...

...™

and with Ouchy's funbags exposed,


thread moved to smutty's.

haven't moved a thread due to titties before.

thanks for making me feel important, head!