...™

Anyone see Colbert roast Bush?

I only saw highlights.
I was waiting for one of you bastards to post a link.

Part 3 has been removed due to copyright infringement.

Part 2 as well. Won't take long before part one is gone as well, I guess.

I guess that's what happens when you joke about Faux News and copyrights.

Sad.

Since the YouTube stuff went away, you can read a transcript here.

It was truly a wonderful thing to watch!!!

Here... look at the ad on the left side of this page:

http://www.rawstory.com/news/2006/Report_C..._Bush_0502.html.

I love Stephanie Miller...

http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/05/03.html#a8147

Click on VIDEO WMP or QT under the article:

Zoller attacks Colbert for mentioning Tuesday

Here you go Abby... and for everyone else who missed it!

http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/04/29.html

VIDEO WMP loads quicker than the Hi-Res Quick Time.

Danke, all I missed was the audition tape part.

I have to say, that was one Balz™y address.

i'm just waiting to read that he was in an 'accident' and died.

...™

...™

Wow!

That picture is scary!

...™

...™

...™

I heart billboard liberation.

...™

...™

...™

...™

Do you really want to hurt me?

Morans!

Nice!

Okay, I take it back, I'm all for open borders
but I still think they should teach english.

Ha!

MR. PRESIDENT, I'M HEADED TO MEXICO

Dear President Bush:
I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family, and I would like to ask you to assist me.
I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few arrangements.
I know you can help with this.
I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here.
So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:
1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I
might need, whether I use them or not.
3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.
5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.
6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.
9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from
Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals on my
car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or
negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.
13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might place on the economy.
I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for
all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that Pres. Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.
However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with your V.P.
Thank you so much for your kind help.
Sincerely,
Joe S. Public

The morans?

yes, starting with this guy

I'm confused...

No wonder they look depressed.

Old Math / New Math


Last week I purchased a burger and fries at McDonalds for $3.58.

The counter girl took my $4.00 and I pulled 8 cents
from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there,
holding the nickel and 3 pennies. While looking at the
screen on her register, I sensed her discomfort and
tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but
she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to
explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried.


Why do I tell you this?

Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s:

Teaching Math In 1950

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His
cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his
profit?


Teaching Math In 1960

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His
cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What
is his profit?


Teaching Math In 1970

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His
cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?


Teaching Math In 1980

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His
cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20 Your
assignment: Underline the number 20.


Teaching Math In 1990

A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is
selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the
habitat of animals or the preservation of our
woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of
$20. What do you think of this way of making a living?
Topic for class participation after answering the
question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the
logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong
answers.)


Teaching Math In 2005

Un ranchero vende una carreta de madera por $100.
El costo de la produccion era $80. Cuantas tortillas
se puede comprar?

That has only the thinnest veneer of humor over a solid set of truths. I find it harder to laugh than I'd like.

Houston, we have a problem.

This might work:

Both republicans and democrats finally found common ground.

They both like the Hilary Clinton bumper sticker.

RUN HILARY RUN

Democrats stick it on the rear bumper .......
and republicans put it in the front.

Ha!

skeletons in the 'closet', much, Mr. Phelps?

Guess who's next

...™

...™

I never thought about it that way.

We have burritos
so I guess we don't need greenbacks

Not that it matters,
we'll be one country soon enough anyways.