1. Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.

2. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

3. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.

5. There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.

6. Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

7. The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer

8. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isnt lifting himself up, hes pushing the Earth down.

9. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

10. Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

...™

It has been proven that Chuck Norris' tears will cure cancer, but sadly, no one can make him cry.