Festering with jealousy.

< festering with gomez.

Thanks to a few of you gents, I managed to stay out of trouble another day.

Tonight's another story, though.

The grand couple of no-shows are waiting for some no-shows. In the meantime, we're drinking more MeowMix and Rat Shit.

Rats..
they xit everywhere. Bastards...

Rat bastards drank everything we had. Little Xits.

It's like they don't give a cat's ass about anyone but themselves.

You need a better mouser.

1st time in too long-
CG's recipe.

Just got my first drunk dial from my new neighborhood pub.

"Ya coomin' down, lass?" (he's a Scotsman)
"Do me a favor. Go out to the parking lot. Do you see a yellow Porsche?"
"Aye, it's right fookin' out front."
"Nope. Call me when it's gone."

I love this town but I met my first freak last night.
I couldn't possibly explain it but it involves a toilet seat and a psychotic cop.
Who might also be a murderer.

I'm not going back there without big scary male friends. And I think we can all agree that Brits aren't the proper reinforcements.

Ha!

Got a call back.
Porsche is gone.

Fun to be had.
I'm off to the bar!

They still haven't found Hoffa.
Nice knowin' ya...

Damnit!

Got to the bar last night and the Porsche was there.
Went to a different bar.

Now I have to go get my car.
Only I'm not totally sure where it is.

This town is not good for me.

Yeah, frankly I worry that that is the case.

Apparently, I need rules.

At least you won't run out of bars.

Malfunctioning internal compass?

No, faulty memory card.

And swift punishment when you break them.

Ha!

I'm being sent to Philly for work tomorrow.
That's the worst punishment I can think of at the moment.

Yeah, but she won't walk out of them, either.

Well played.

Seems to me Missy Cobra moved
to Mongooseville.

That's enough of that.

Well, I'm in Philly.
Been here about 3 hours.
Already bored.
Heading to the bar.
Much less trouble to be found here.

Does trouble know that?

I dunno, There a lot of bars in Philly . . .




and it is awful close to ATown .

Hotel bar, silly.
Like I'd venture out into downtown Trevose at night. By myself.

That was actually fun. One beer turned into a lot more, but the bartender was cool and promised no to let on about my drinking when I show up tomorrow night with my work colleagues.

And they have Chartreuse.

So let me try to sum this up. You left AZ, are trying to get your footing, and now have developed a sudden phobia of yellow porches? Sounds like a ton of fun. I have only one thing that I feel must be answered. Your new Bartender? Is she hot?

She's the xit.
And her mom comes into the bar, too.
The older broad taught the younger broad everything she knows.
It's a family thing.
Have I mentioned that I really love Vegas?

I already miss it.

I even miss my little poncey, balding, saddle-sniffing wankers.

That's really cool to hear, Im happy for you. I would say I would come visit but you know me better than to believe that xit. Besides I've done the whole Mommy taught me everything I know crap to death. Might be cool when seen on the outside, but when your in a pit putting on the lotion. Well actually that's not so bad either. But I digress. You did perk my interest with the whole webcam though, A.B Gone Wild . Now that's a late night informercial worth watching. If it's anything like your late night phone calls, just might have to break out the cobbweb infested credit card.

Naaaa, you'd just see me passed out on my futon with some drunken psychotic cop running around ripping my toilet seat off.

And don't quote the post above yours, silly.

Christ, I'm outta booze and the hotel bar is prolly closed by now.
I may have to do shots of hotel Scope.

That's not a good sign, is it?

Scope shooters are pretty much the same thing as drinking Tunel, or Elixier, so just pretend you're partying with Paris Hilton, and drinking what the stars drink. It's all about mental context...

Not at all helpful, Bill.

dang.

Honk for English.

My boss travels to Philly a dozen times per year.

And he's always bitching about the service.

I come here once a year and I've got bartenders buying me drinks and cabbies giving me free tours of the city and hotel staff spending hours in my room unsealing a window so I can get fresh air.

I'm thinking he needs an attitude adjustment.

Or bigger tits.

I prefer to think that it's my winning smile and charming personality.

But you're prolly right.

Crosby is always right. And of course it's the breasts. Service with a busty smile.
I know I'll be hearing all about how wrong I was saying Crosby is always right on her next phone call.

Just tell me where to send the appology booze A.B

Who the fuck is Snoredspaz?

No one important, not even worth a look past your booze. Just pass me off as a hallucination and all will be right with the world again.

I could give you a push w/the
window thing, Wogger.

Ha!
I'm on the top floor today, so no thanks. Got it covered.

Tippin' a Tuckerman Headwall Alt. A German style brown ale. Outta Conway, NH. It's pretty good. Kinda malty and hoppy at the same time. Sweet with a bitter undertone. Kinda smells like paint though. Or maybe that is the leftover paint on me fingers from painting the bathroom earlier. I would recommend it if you get the chance.

Eating paint? Sounds good!