You know what I fucking hate?
I mean, what cave does one have to grow up in?
What degree of social deprivation does it take?
On the escalator, folks, STAND ON THE RIGHT AND PASS ON THE LEFT!

It’s not difficult.
It boggles my mind…

How 'bout you?

people sitting in the passing lane.

pop-up ads.

stupid little subscription cards (especially in magazines you recieved via SUBSCRIPTION)

the cost of shipping whilst buying absinthe.

people who use the words pedagogy and paradigm.

smoking (now that i'm a non-smoker....yes, i'm an evil hypocrite)

bars that don't carry Guinness or good Scotches.

work.

children.





(people who can't fucking proofread and have to edit.)

Groups of people that walk down the sidewalk in chorus-line formation. DO YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU OWN THE FUCKING SIDEWALK???????? Goddamn tourists...

People who run into the back of my shoes with thier fucking strollers. DO YOU FUCKING PEOPLE THINK THAT YOU HAVE IMMUNITY TO A GOOD, SWIFT ASSKICKING JUST BECAUSE YOU DECIDED TO NOT USE CONTRACEPTION????????

People who talk on cell phones loudly on the subway. SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!

People that bring babies to movie theaters. DID YOU THINK I BOUGHT A TICKET SO I COULD SIT HERE FOR TWO HOURS AND LISTEN TO YOUR FUCKING KID SHRIEK & CRY, ALL THE WHILE TRYING TO RESTRAIN MYSELF FROM GETTING UP FROM MY CHAIR AND BEATING THE CRAP OUT OF YOU???????

Guys violently yelling at their girlfriends in public. WHAT KIND OF PIECE OF SHIT ASSHOLE ARE YOU????? Don't look now, but there's a guy behind you with shaggy brown hair and a sledge hammer, YOU STUPID FUCK!!!!!!!

Stupid people. WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?????????

People in the RH lane of the highway who hit the breaks when someone is comming up the on ramp to merge, thus confusing the merge lane traffic and prducing a FUCKING TRAFFIC JAM!

Haha!
This thread is going to get long!

#1 Rimmy: I completely agree about the people with cell phones on the subway. "Honey, I'm on the train. I'll be home in about 5 minutes. How was work? Did you pick Johnny up? Good."
You're 5 minutes from home! Just wait, and *gasp* talk to your spouse IN PERSON!

#2 When people use apostrophes in plurals. I.e., "Purveyor's of fine wine." Ok, I'm not going to buy $200/bottle wine from a jack ass who has that painted (at a good cost, I'm sure) in giant letters on his delivery van. It just plain makes you look stupid. We're talking third grade grammar here...

#3 The fact that it is impossible to make a left turn in New Jersey. Even where the roads are designed to allow this, it is almost always illegal regardless.

I have so many pet peeves, I'm not even going to get started on the others...

The biggest NYC pet peeve of all---
Picky upper east side ladies whose bagel order goes something like this:

"give me a sesame bagel, just lightly toasted, but not too dark cause you did it too dark last time, but not cold either, with a super thin layer of butter, not too much cause you put too much on last time, and low fat vegetable cream cheese without the carrots, but don't put too much on cause it will fall out when I bite it, and make sure when you cut it in half you cut it right down the middle".

If I worked in a deli when they ordered that, I give them a turd in a hotdog bun!

And then their Starbucks order goes something like this:
Could I have a half decaf half caf Vente soy milk mochaccino with sweet and low, extra foam, cinnamon, and cocoa sprinkles on top? (order placed while holding the leash to their pomeranian that has a bow in it's hair and is wearing a cashmir dog sweater from Bloomingdales).

Festus's #2, plus the misuse-of-quotes thing:

On "sale" now...
Debby bakes the world's "best" pies...

What is being said here? Who is being quoted? What the fuck is that punctutation supposed to mean? Why add punctuation that doesn't somehow clarify the meaning?

Whenever I see this, I wind up more confused than I would have been if they had left the damn quote marks off.

You oughta have to have a license to use the Enligsh language.

Hehe, reminds me of my recent flight home. I had a 2 hour layover in San Fran. Now there is an interesting place to watch people.
I was sitting at a coffee shop that was run by two Japanese ladies. A guy comes up who is Asian, but wearing ultra-gay clothes. Sure enough, he orders in a perfectly cultivated San Fran lisp, "Can I like, have one of those mufthins? No, no, the one there with loths of cinnamon." The lady gets his muffin and asks, "Where are you from?" He says "I'm a dancther, from Honolulu." At which point, the lady starts talking to him in Japanese. They chat for a while, the whole time this guy is switching back and forth from perfectly normal-sounding Japanese to flaming-gay-American lisp. It might have very well been the oddest thing I've seen in an airport. (But then, I don't spend much time at SFO.)

unintentionally funny?

That also drives me crazy! I have learned in my embittering (imbittering?) schooling, however, that seemingly mis-placed quotes actually have a purpose. Usually, the purpose is to avoid false advertising suits. At least back in the 60s and 70s, you could put claims in quotes, and simply say that that is your corporation's view of the product. For example, "most efficient" cleaning mechanism in a modern engine. I don't think this flies any more though. The new thing is to use the word "style" instead.
Old, Victorian era, vintage style inkwell! Only $100! The key word there is "style." It is not vintage, old, or from the Victorian era. It is a reproduction. The deeper you can bury "style" in a list of adjectives, the more likely you are to deceive people.

...Yeah, officer, you got me. I was speeding. I know: 'speed kills.' I'll try to be safer. Yeah, I know. I know there are kids in the area. Yes, absolutely bad judgment on my part. Really, I won't let it happen again. Yes, thank you officer. You say I can pay this online? That's great. Thank you officer...

yeah, well, it always gives me a giggle when people make a spelling or grammatical error while they are criticizing others for doing the same.

i am guilty of that myself



here's a couple more:

Pro-Lifers who kill. um.......

in fact ANY killing in the name of religion....makes absofuckinglutely no sense.

cell phones in general....if i'm not at work or at home, chances are that i'm doing something where i don't want to be bothered by a phone call.

tiny spare tires.....how fucking cheap can you be, Mr. Ford?

paying a huge sum for cable TV and not being able to find something to watch.

calling up ANYWHERE and getting a stupid computer talking to me.

me.

People who say "supposably"

dangling prepositions..."where's it at?"

my friend who writes brilliantly yet can't spell words that end in -ful without adding an extra L

everything else about grammar and syntax previously stated

the bitchy little shopkeeper in Quebec who refused to speak French to me in 1990

mimes

Left land bandits.

I swear one day I'm getting a light
bar for the Cavalier and honkin' big
wrench. Anyone caught dawdling in
the passing lane gets pulled the fuck
over and then I'll remove their
steering wheel, put it in trunk, and
drive away.

Everthing Celticgent lists plus

raisin cinnamon bagels, religion in general though the western varieties are worse,

toilet paper that faces the wrong way

spam you can't block because the "sender' keeps changing,

American beer

arrogant ignorance

bosses who think they own you

mass culture garbage (shlock music, rap, sappy commercial illustration. . .)

People (I refuse to call them parents)who bring their kids to the (bar, bowling alley, Denny's, insert place here) after 9pm on school days. My hatred goes up with every passing hour. I think anyone who brings their sub-15 year old into any public place besides the fucking hospital after midnight should be shot on site.

People who don't speak english in public. I come from a melting pot of nationalities, with several of the older ones being 'off the boat'. They were all raised to know that 'while you can speak greek, german, italian, etc here at home, when you walk out that door, you will speak ENGLISH!'. I think what bothers me most is that to me, it would be a MASSIVE decision to come to another country to LIVE THERE (as opposed to visit). I would want to make sure that me and my family knew a little about the country, it's history, it's culture, it's laws, and for God's Sake, it's language, before going. Those that never bothered to learn to so much as write their fucking name in english piss me off and boggle my brain. Yes, I worked in retail.

Prudes. Lighten up.

People who start movements. I hate all of them. Even those that are rallying for something I believe in piss me off. Find something better to do with your time then block traffic in Times Square, thus ruining my day, stalling ambulances trying to save some poor mo-fo's life, etc. I live how folks that can afford to fly across the country (first class half the time), take a week off of work, and carry a placard are the ones who are 'REALLY CONCERNED' about the plight of 'Insert_group/movement/cause_here'. I wish I had that kind of free time and disposable income.

Middle Management. I usualyl have a good report with the folks at my level, as well as the folks up at the top, when I get to talk with them. The ones in the middle, to me, seem to be doing nothing more then taking up space, micro-managing me, and otherwise sucking up valuable salary dollars that could be given to us pions at the bottom.

More as I think of them.

I have one to add:

SOCCER MOMS & MINI VANS - YOU DO NOT RULE THE FUCKING ROAD & GET OFF OF YOUR CELL PHONE!!!!!!!!!!

People who list pet peeves.

I think the vast majority of folks 'inconsiderate' enough to fail to learn the language before moving here would love to, but find it difficult to find the time between shifts at the sweat shop.

i hate people who hate

I thought that this would be the very first post. I was quite surprised.

Starbucks. Starbucks. STARBUCKS.


The first one in South America has just opened -- in Santiago, Chile. It's only six blocks from my apartment, so I checked it out. Stood in line and everything.

I have news for you. Those Upper East Side women, the ones with their Pomeranians, are an intercontinental tribe. We have them here in Santiago: they're called "cuicas", which means "rich, spoiled, tanning salon-orange, Gucci-sporting, self-important, bottle-blonde snobs". And Starbucks is their new stomping ground.

"Dame un frapus-s-s-sino, por fa'. Gra-a-acia', chi-i-i-ica."

They've been to Miami and New York about a thousand times, so they think they're worldly. This worldliness comes to a screeching halt when faced with the Starbucks menu. "Hafff cafff? Mo-scha?" What is it? How do you pronounce it? All of which prompts a two-minute explanation from the cashier, and a five-minute struggle to select something. (In the end, the cheapest one is chosen.)

And now a HOOTERS has opened across the street. At least it has no cuicas.

Ultra Gay clothes? What are "ULTRA GAY CLOTHES" ??? You mean like this quote?

Quit picking fights with your betters. It is unbecoming, and may force us to tie you up and leave you in the corner.

The Shmoo. What the fuck is a Shmoo???

ultra gay clothes:

Which way should toilet paper face? Maybe the toilet?

GUESS WHAT FOLKS, IT IS MY 100 POST! YEPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

reminds me of the little movie Johnny shows his brother in Johnny Dangerously.

Don't you hate it, when your Pet Peeves on the floor.

Those already listed:Babies in movie theaters,long Starbucks orders,rap,
supposably.

My own:

Young children brought to R-rated movies because the parents
could'nt find a sitter or do'nt want to pay for one.The children often
ask endless questions about the movie.

People who do not pull over,stop,or even slow down for emergency
vehicles.I once saw someone hit by an ambulance.The ambulance
workers had to stop to attend to him.

Nucular(especially from the president.)pallow,malk.

People who repeatedly push the walk button instead of just pushing it
once.

I do agree about learning english.Many people want to learn,but
cannot because of work schedules,or long waiting lists for english
classes.

I also despise slow moving groups of people monopolizing the entire sidewalk and...

-People driving and speaking on their cellphones at the same time

-Hummer H2's and people that drive them in the suburbs of NJ

-People clipping thier fingernails on the train.

-People that paddle for every single wave regardless of their position, priority and others around them. (surfing gripe)

-"panels of experts"

-people who assume because you have tattoos that you want to share them with the whole world. Some have even gone so far as to pull up my clothes without asking, wtf?

-the salvation army bell ringer outside my window at work. ring, ring,ring all day with that little high-pitched bell. it's like water torture.

-the "cool girl" quiz. i.e. being at an interesting event that is generally attended by males such as a tech trade show or the comicbook store and being subjected to a series of questions intended to "see if I really know my stuff"
-when I ask a question at said places having the person I am asking either answer my husband instead or look at him first as if to get his approval that it's okay to address some other guys chick.

back to work for me (and no, that's not a pet peeve)

-jen

hell, that's why i GET tattoos....

According to the industry-standard stylebook, quotation marks have four uses. Of course, they denote quotations. They can also be used for composition titles, unfamiliar terms or nicknames and — my favorite — to indicate irony.

When I see a word in quotations that looks like it shouldn't be, I always assume that the latter use was intended. Hence, BaaBaaDoc's "sale" probably doesn't offer very good deals.

Since quotation mark misuse peeves me also, I was compelled to "contribute" my "astute observation" to this "illuminating" discussion. Thank you for your "attention."

Keep in mind that I run several bars/restaurants.
so :PTFA:

- Bad tippers. (15% is shitty folks, get real)
- Rude patrons that assume thier server is in a different social class/intelectual level/financial bracket and deserves to be treated as an indentured servant.
- Rude Patrons. Next time your out, be sure to insult your server...'cause they will be handling your food and beverages for the next 8 hours.

-This conversation -"Hello, how big is your large pizza"?
"16 inches"
"Yeah, but how big is it... how many slices, I'm not sure how hungry we are, so I need to know how many slices are in your large pizza".

---------> my response "Well, If you're really hungry we'll slice it into 32. If
you just want a snack we'll do a 2 cut".

-Slow drivers
-Bad drivers
-Arrogance
-Cheapskates
-Scammers
-Losers

Man this is a long list....

""You"re very welcome", he said".

Here in Chile, the standard tip is 10%. When I tell Chileans that in the U.S.A. it's 15-20%, they declare that American restaurant patrons must be rich.

When I tell it to Chilean servers, they wonder why they're in Chile.

"Thanks," Peeps. I "appreciate" your "input." I found it "educational" and "humorous."

That pizza comment reminds me of a scene in Rainman.The autistic
brother(sorry,I ca'nt remember his name)wants six fish sticks instead
of three,so Raymond cuts them in half.

Outstanding.

Americans who refuse to learn other people's languages, especially when visiting a foreign country. The corollary to this is Americans who refuse to respect other culture's ways of doing things "if it ain't American it ain't right". These same folks always seem to stay at Holiday Inn type motels or have RV's with satelite dishes.

Americans who can't even use their one & only, native language properly.

People who expect the rest of the populace to find their spawn as absolutely adorable & worthwhile as they do, even while aforementioned spawn is busy dumping food down your neck & generally making a ruckus in an expensive restaurant.

Comics who seem to feel the use of motherfucker every other word constitutes humor as well as hip freedom of expression.

Hollywood & network TV catering to the bottom 5% of the population, thus contributing to the dumbing down of America.

Christian Right groups that try to enforce their moronic "evolution is an unproven theory" ideas onto an entire country & the school districts that knuckle under to them.

Christian Right groups that try to enforce ANY of their moronic ideas upon the population at large.

Dictator Shrub & the masses that continue to support his theft of the American nation even after PROOF that Gore won the election!

Haha, I agree... And also with JBL - every time I see a soccer mom picking up her 6th grader in an H2, I just want to beat her senseless. A minivan has the same utility, gets better gas milage, and costs $40,000 - $20,000 less. H2 == pure, unadulterated status symbol.

Haha, now THAT is ultra-gay clothes! (Peter pan boy, no need to re-post the frightening image.) I stand corrected Hellcat... they were not ultra-gay, just obviously-gay.

Good point, BaaBaaDoc... I have found myself that learning another language *before* you go to the country is very, very difficult. Some people maybe just have a knack for languages, but for me anyway, I just don't learn it unless it is total immersion - i.e., living in a country where that language is spoken. Alot of people who move here really do try to learn English. I reckon many or most of them do not even have the opportunity to try to study it before coming to America.

The counterpart of this is rude servers.

Tips are not an entitlement. They must be earned. Rude servers get nothing, or a lousy tip to let them know that I didn't forget, but didn't appreciate the attitude. I don't worry about what they will do next time, because there won't be a next time at that establishment. An average tip is very easy to earn. Simple common courtesy. An excellent tip requires something extra. A smile, anticipation of something instead of having to be asked, passing from "tolerable" to "genuinely pleasant", honest recommendations, etc.

Pet peeve?

valets and bellboys

I don't use either. I can park my own car and carry my own damned bags. Don't stand there in my way with your hand out looking for my money. You didn't damned do any service for me, so get the hell out of the way. When I use a service, I'm appreciative and generous, but the people looking for automatic donations get on my nerves.

This will be a really long thread.

Oh goody, a debate.... I wish I had time to get deeper. This should be fun.

Maybe back in 1963 it was this way, but no longer. Tips are a necesarry factor in adding up your bill. Some restaurants will automatically add in a gratuity or service charge to prevent skinflints from skinflinting.

In the US chances are your server is working for minimum wage(minimum tipped employee wage, which is significantly lower than your shitty hourly minimum wage). What that means is that they depend on "tips" for a living. That means you, the patron, have the responsibility of paying for their time. Your server is there to serve, assist, and guide you through the systems setup by the restaurant. If they spend time with you, and are not compensated, then you are in fact wasting their time, and taking money from their pockets.

Watch resevoir dogs for another little service diatribe...

One tips out of common courtesy, and for a job done... or well done. It's the price of the dining/drinking experience. You do not tip on the quality of food, dining experiece or things that are outside the realm of a servers influence.

Think of it as Christmas everytime you go out. Spread the wealth and good cheer. Don't be a miser.

There are rude and inattentive servers, and unfortunately they can make your experience miserable. In such a circumstance tips over 15% are uncalled for. If you feel extremely slighted and decide to leave a very small or zero tip then at least make the effort of speaking to a manager about your issues. That way the server will be told why they we're stiffed, the management will know they have a potential bad server, and you might feel slightly better about being heard.

Bottom line... if you can't afford to tip, or are too miserly to leave a decent tip. Stay home and eat microwave dinners.

Go Drinkslinger!

Everyone should have to work in the service industry at some point so they can realize exactly how much of an asshole they've been up until then.

- Former bartender / cocktail waitress

Some places do add gratuities for large parties. As long as they disclose that, I have no problem with it. I think there, it is more to make sure that a tip gets in, when it might be missed if everyone just pitches in for "their share".

But if it isn't spelled out on the menu, it isn't in the "contract". It doesn't go to the restaurant's bank account. It goes to the server, based on that individual server's performance.



If they do those things you mentioned with a minimum of common courtesy, they will always get a tip from me. 99.9...% of them do. But for that raging asshole every few years that sees me as a series of dollar bills, or as a blank line above the total on my credit slip, acting without a shred of common decency, I reserve the right not to tip. Those few assholes are in the wrong job. They do a disservice to their fellow workers in the industry. Sometimes I'll tell the manager, sometimes I won't. It isn't my responsibility as a patron to do so. The establishment should be running quality control on itself, without relying on customers as a stream of guinea pigs.



I agree with that. I used to be a cook. I'm sure waiters got screwed for kitchen mistakes on occasion. It isn't right. I also know that the kitchen got blamed for a lot of waiters messing up orders. Whatever. If a waiter comes and says, "Your food is taking a lot longer than I expected. I'll get it to you as soon as it is ready", then no sweat. If they ignore the table completely, letting our glasses go dry, avoiding eye contact for 30 minutes, depriving us of the opportunity to add an appetizer to hold us until the food arrives, then they are doing us a disservice. The attentiveness and polite communication are well within their abilities, even if the food itself isn't.



Rhetorically, in that situation, why is any tip called for? Why should I pay for a miserable experience? They aren't doing their job correctly, if at all. When I don't do my job right, I get chewed out, skipped at bonus time, or fired. Why should they be exempt from accountability for their actions?



Sometimes I will, sometimes not. Like I said, it is the restaurant's responsibility to keep their standards up, not mine.



And if a server can't manage to act with decency, they should quit and get a different job.

Deal?

I'm going to actually (sort of) come to Justin's defense on this one.

"That means you, the patron, have the responsibility of paying for their time. Your server is there to serve, assist, and guide you through the systems setup by the restaurant."

Justin's post made it fairly (though not entirely) clear that this is not the kind of server he is speaking of, and stiffing. I think he stated that it is a server that performs the above-said functions and duties you mentioned that will be tipped well. Makes sense to me.

"There are rude and inattentive servers, and unfortunately they can make your experience miserable. In such a circumstance tips over 15% are uncalled for. If you feel extremely slighted and decide to leave a very small or zero tip then at least make the effort of speaking to a manager about your issues. That way the server will be told why they we're stiffed, the management will know they have a potential bad server, and you might feel slightly better about being heard."

I think that THIS is the type of server he is refering to. The kind that is excedingly rude, unattentive, etc, that has done nothing to improve, assist, or otherwise attend to your dining experience. When I was a server (yup, waited tables for a year, and I was a bartender for 2), I think I got $2.80 an hour without the tips. I made sure that I was earning them. When I screwed up and got a shitty tip, I'd know it and understand. When I did good to great and wasn't tipped, I knew THAT too. I'd remember those customers. I also want to point out that I subscribe to your idea of 'if they are REALLY bad and you don't plan on leaving anything/much, call over a manager.'. BUT, when a server is THAT bad, often they can fall under the intimidating, aggressive, vindictive catagory. They will hover over you and the manager while you talk, thus making it impossible for the average person to feel at ease. They already ruined your dning experience. Now, it is up to the patron to go the extra mile to be made to feel bad? Bah!

I have witnessed it among co-workers while doing it (really shitty, mean-spirited servers), and as a patron. It is no fun to talk about how bad someone is when you know tey are nearby, or will find out in the next 10 minutes, etc.

I tip 20% typically. 12-15% if they are bad. 25-30% if they are exceptional. I have been known to give a '2 cent' tip too though. If they are TREMENDOUSLY bad, I will leave 2 pennies, thus pointing out that them that I did not forget to tip them, and that yes, my dining experience with you was THAT bad. I hold to the (hope) belief that if a dreadful server gets enough 2 cent tips from people, s/he'll get the point and find another career.

One final thing. I make a point to NEVER confuse service with food quality, cleanliness, atmosphere, or anything else. Besides being a server, I was a cook too. If your food stinks, it's not the servers fault. They didn't make it. Place smells like/looks like ass, also not their fault.

Anyway, that is this former server's take on pride in ones job.

What Larspeart said. Exactly.

Sometimes the "innatentive' server is handling too many tables and a slow kitchen. Unless they are plainly rude, tip 20% minimum or eat at home. Waiters are usually paid far less than the minimum wage and everyone has shitty days.

Parents who let their kids run wild are a pet peeve of mine as well. If I had a restaurant (and I've had one in the past) I would have a "Family Section" curtained of for those who don't have the sense to get a baby sitter.

As for those who start or participate in movements; I appreciate the 8 hour day, weekends, and the limited rights and guarantees we have including women's and civil rights. These were fought for and won by people who started and participated in movements (and many died for it) To me, anyone who, after working and doing everything the rest of us do, is willing to put themselves on the line for all of our benefit is a hero. If we all committed to participate for a year or two the world would be a better place and we might even avoid extinction.

One of my pet peeves are the folks, who no matter what the issue is that people are out for, yell "get a job" as they drive by.

RIght. Especially if the protestors are protesting high unemployment, poverty-level wages, or poor working conditions.