I find myself in New Orleans this morning.

Yesterday my wife was taking me to lunch for my Bday, and when I got in the car with her she handed me a pair of plane tickets.


So, we are in Metairie and down here till saturday. Any locals care to meet up and show us the non tourist sites?

Your wife rocks!

Get out of Metairie...Go to the Garden District or Uptown. You'll enjoy that much better. Non tourist stuff.

Here's a clue...Stay out of the French Quarter. Unless you like drunken crowds, snail-slow traffic, paying $15 and up for parking, and seeing mildly attractive tourists showing their tits. .....Then you'll have a blast!

Sorry I can't show you around, I'll be out of town...Plus, I don't drive during Mardi Gras.

Stop by the Pharmacy Museum & Lucullus Antiques (Bring your credit Card if you want to buy a glass).

Yes, definitely stop at the Pharmacy museum. Lucullus is nice for looking, but way too expensive for buying. Make absolutely sure you stop and have a muffaletta at Central Grocery in the Quarter. Best sandwich I've ever had in my entire life! As the others said, the Garden District is amazing. Lafayette cemetery is beautiful...

Ok, so there IS a reason to get
hitched.

Cheers, my friend. Sorry no advice,
it's been too long.

True...True...

There is another place called Charlies Deli in Lakeview. They serve Muffaletta's, of course, but this place is known for the MOON SANDWICH!

Overstuffed sandwich on the same Muffaletta bread (large and round). Hot Roast Beef, Ham, and cole slaw, and here's the kicker...Russian Dressing. Holy Moon Sandwich, Batman...This is good. And I betcha can't eat the whole thing. Tell Sharon Hi for me.

Here's some more good stuff:

Go to Camelia Grill on the corner of St. Charles and Carrollton for breakfast. Kick's arss!

Go to Dos Jefes for cool jazz and cigars. - Very nice! Tell the cabbie it's on Tchoupitoulas St. (CHOP-UH-TWO-LIS)

Go to Cooter Browns for beer from all over the world - adjacent to Camelia Grill.

Don't forget to ride the street car from one end of St. Charles to the other...that will give you an idea of Uptown and the Garden District.

Fun stuff...

Stay in your room and fuck your wife-
lots.

Yeah ... give her the ol' "French Quarter," if you know what I mean.

DG

Le quarter inch?
That's on you, Stubby.

Excuse me? I'll have you know that back home they call me the "French Loaf."

However, I think it's more about my lack of motivation than my penis size.

DG

Your lack of buttah speaks volumes.

Yes, but it is hard and crusty.

DG

*crunch*

Just don't get your loaf caught in the toaster.

If you're doin' some parade watching, stay away from the French Quarter. Parades are awesome to watch uptown in the Garden District on St. Charles Ave.

The crowds are MUCH smaller and more manageable, and it is mostly local families.

Wear a tutu for me.

I thought your other half did the tutu thing for you.

I take back everything...STAY AWAY! STAY INDOORS! Just do some fucking, as suggested.

Last night there was a big gang shootout in the middle of St. Charles Ave. One dead, 3 injured...all innocent bystanders. Suspects: 15 to 19 years old.

Tonight, attempted murder in the same area...this time he was not even old enough to drive. 13 years old with the gun.

This is not in some bad neighborhood or in an alley...this is right out in the open on a major, usually nice, parade route.

Maybe next year I'll opt to go to LCLF or something.

Your wife fucking rocks.

Did that, with the noise and the grease, im glad I was NOT hung over this AM.

Going to Tipitinas to see the Radiators tonight, havent been to Tips in about 14 years, will be fun.

And yes, Jade- the only REAL Burnt™ absinthe is the best!

Was Ned that easy to find? I should get over there more often.

Maybe his wife is named Jade- the only REAL Burnt™ absinthe.

Correct, my wifes name is Jade- the only REAL Burnt™ absinthe, we had a blast in Nawlins, thanks for all of the local insight.

As for the rest of the comments

I was just there last month, but since I was there with work, and they had us staying in the quarter (well, on Canal, just off the Quarter, 2 blocks from Bourbon), I spent my time in Bourbon, doing touristy things: Getting drunk, smoking handrolled cigars, hitting titty bars, blues bars, rock bars, Pat O'Brians (best way to start off a night is one of their Hurricane's), and watching drunken girls pop their tops/bottoms.

Hit the garden district, do a cemetary tour, see the swamps at least once, and do a haunted history tour if ya get the chance.

BUT. . . since it is Mardi Gras, those are probably all totally full, so just get drunk, screw you wife (who ROCKS) and get drunk.

Oh, and the Old Absinthe House had great service and a decent, fairly intelligent bartender the 1st night I went there. The second night I went there, it was a total NOROM.

Have fun!

He's already home, silly.

In January? Doesn't it get cold down there? Them nips must've been hard enough to cut glass.

I've been watching all the stupidity from cyberspace-Nola.com has cams on Bourbon St. and a parade cam on St. Charles St. just missed the shooting the other night , but saw the police wrapping up their investigations.

I still think this would be a great off-season place for an LF.

Nope, it was in the 60's the whole time I was down there, and it always seems a few degrees warmer once you get on Bourbon street. No, it never gets cold in NO, but then again, I live in Michigan.

Plenty of nudity. I went there the week of the Sugar Bowl.

I just got back from a Lundi Gras luncheon on a balcony down at Jackson Square. The tits were poppin...even in the middle of the rain.

For the right beads, it wouldn't matter if there was a tsunami here.

I'll try to post my pics collection after Mardi Gras.

Please do.

I likes boobies. Get 'em up!

I went there over Halloween several years ago and it was
fucking interesting.

Lots of pretty much everyting, including a mess I wasn't
into - but, it was a pretty good time.

Since when are you not into a mess?

Yep, a pretty good time...

Start a thread in Smuttty's for that please.
Don't need anyone gettin' grief at work
or w/the wife and kids.

Not like this:

I was refering to the bartop-dancing gay dude
flapping his sopping wet dangled pouch into my beer.

Yeah, wastin' beer is a no no.

It was xit beer but still, who needs stirrers

Damn...this is the public eye, isn't it...

Sorry Mayor!

No worries.
Just

Well, yeah. Who wants to watch boobs when you could be fending off Jack's advances.... uhh...


Got a spare room?